Read: Proverbs 3-4
I’m not sure I should post this, but I hope it’s useful for something. It’s real and transparent, though it only scratches the surface of the challenges of the day.
In particular, Proverbs 3:5-6 forms the basis for Nothing I Hold Onto, (Will Reagan and United Pursuit). This song echoed in my head after discovering the robbery of our empty house a few years ago. Thieves broken in and removed all of the appliances, mirrors, etc., as we served in Monterey, CA. Our insurance company essentially said, sucks to be you and we were left footing that bill completely. In the next week we hope to close on the sale of that same house as we empty our savings to reduce the principal to meet market demands. The financial loss is unbelievable, but very real.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.
While Zoe is left to close on the sale with my power of attorney, I will have the privilege of visiting a church with Healthy Growing Churches in an effort to help them find a path that will reinvigorate their church, to set them on a new life-cycle to be an effective witness to their community for the kingdom. I’ll get to meet with the Management Team for Restore Christian Church in Jacksonville, NC, and finish my part of launching that new church. I’ll get a chance to work other projects with HGC to reshape the way many think about discipleship and I’ll be honored to help out as best I can with the local church here in Anderson, SC.
Here’s the plain truth: I’d rather be doing these activities to support the kingdom than working for some company for financial gain.
Honor the Lord with your wealth,
with the firstfruits of all your crops;
then your barns will be filled to overflowing,
and your vats will brim over with new wine.
Honestly, I don’t need barns that are overflowing or vats filled with new wine, but I will trust that God has a plan in all this mess.
Have no fear of sudden disaster
or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,
for the Lord will be at your side
and will keep your foot from being snared.
My comfort comes from knowing that the Lord is at my side.
The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom.
Though it cost all you have, get understanding.
I pray that there is great gain in wisdom as we go through these next few weeks. In this trial my prayer is simply:
Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it.
Keep your mouth free of perversity;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
Let your eyes look straight ahead;
fix your gaze directly before you.
Give careful thought to the paths for your feet
and be steadfast in all your ways.
Do not turn to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil.
We all have burdens to bear and it’s not my intent to cast this burden on anyone, I’m just being real and transparent. For a few brief moments this week I was able (and will be able) to lose my selfish thoughts in music, in playing guitar as part of authentic worship. That’s the best therapy I can think of.
Lord, help me keep my eyes straight ahead, fixed on you and your perfect plan for my life, for my family and friends. Keep my feet on paths of righteousness when I struggle to see what’s in front of me. I completely trust you have a reason and purpose behind all of this, though it’s honestly very difficult to understand. Perhaps that’s the point:
I lean not on my own understanding,
my life is in the hands of the maker of heaven.
I give it all to you Lord
Trusting that you’ll make something beautiful out of me.
There’s nothing I hold onto.
Nothing I Hold Onto, Will Reagan